relationships take a surprising amount of vulnerability to actually go somewhere, which is why it’s so difficult to have a successful relationship. it’s extremely terrifying to place so much of your faith, of yourself in general, to another person.
and even if you decide to withhold, the more you keep from your partner the less you receive in return. at least that’s what my experience has been thus far and why i wouldn’t necessarily consider any of my relationships successes because either i was too closed off or they were.
vulnerability is such a powerful and fragile thing. trust is so hard to earn back. how long can you be with the same person without eventually wanting more from them, and at what point do you realize that this person fulfills you, has taken your vulnerability for granted, or you have taken theirs for granted?
i love love, i love being in love, i love seeing others in love, but ultimately when i look back and think about being in a romantic relationship because i’m lonely and crave companionship i have to remind myself that there’s so much more to it than simply cuddling, the fun and funny moments… it’s also learning how to exist w/ another person and learning new ways to let someone in. and that usually helps me slow down and really process what it is i want. building that kinda love takes time
